Barbary pirates stole her from her bed, and carried her off to be the wife of the Sultan.

Lisa said that she would have liked to be the Sultaness.

Lisa lay on my bed with her legs in the air.

Lisa said that she would have liked to be a Barbary pirate.

Lisa lay on my bed with her hands under her chin.

Lisa lay on my bed with her hair all loose over the pillows.

Lisa said she’d do anything if she could be somebody some day.

Lisa had a gold locket on a chain around her neck and frills on her knickers.

Lisa wanted to be a pirate or a Sultaness.

But nobody knew if there were pirates, or Sultanesses.

Perhaps she just vanished, perhaps, perhaps, perhaps.

Atoms and atoms. Perhaps her physics were all wrong too.

After all, there was no proof of any of it.

All the gone girls.

Anonymous asked: No.

Look harder.

moreorlessredacted:

I fucking hate today.

I look like shit. I feel like shit.

It’s the 25^th. When did it become the 25^th?

Ella was on the phone with me this morning. She said something about makeup. I couldn’t find the makeup. I didn’t know what makeup was or why she was saying those words in my ears. I…

[redacted]

Lisa used to say that [redacted] would get everything she deserved. Lisa used to say that [redacted] was a bimbo. Lisa used to say [redacted] [redacted] [redacted].

Lisa always hated [redacted] because she shaved her legs and Lisa is a feminist.

(via moreorlessredacted-deactivated2)

3.3

Left.

Apparently P. Madau et al have got our girl all figured out.

Maybe somebody, somewhere could explain her physics, or maybe not.

One day [redacted] wakes up and she can’t remember anything and she sees my phone number by her bed so she calls me.

I am really not very surprised because Lisa has always hated her.

I tell her she should take her pyjamas off and she should have a shower and she should get dressed.

I talk her through taking off her pyjamas and then getting into the shower, she puts the phone on loudspeaker on the edge of the sink.

Knickers and a bra and it is a good job I have been to [redacted’s] house lots and I know which drawer is her knicker drawer and which is her bra drawer.

(two top drawers in her bureau)

Blue stripy knickers and a white bra and socks with cows on the ankles that say WHAT A MOOTIFUL DAY around the top in green letters.

Jeans and a t-shirt.

I tell her boots and she puts on boots.

She says, “I look a state.” and I expect she does because I have never once seen [redacted] without makeup on ever but there is no way I could talk her through foundation and eyeliner on the phone.

I offer to come over and when I have hung up the phone I look at the wall and wish Lisa wasn’t so ruthless.

My mum says Lisa is totally lacking in the milk of human kindness and it is true.

LOST: LISA

REWARD OFFERED

PLEASE REPLY TO THIS ACCOUNT IF SEEN

THANKYOU

Today is International Missing Children’s Day which means they look for all the children who forgot to comply with the laws of Physics and bent their particley things into nothingness.

I would go looking for Lisa but to tell you the truth she probably doesn’t want to be found because she is sulking because my sister called her an anomaly and also because Candice said that feminism was bullshit.

Perhaps some of the children will be found and some of them will not be.

Let us pray.

Our Father who Art In Heaven Hallow Ed Be Thy Name Thy King

Dom Come Thy Will Be Done On Earth

Azitis In Heaven

Give Us This Day our Day Lee Bread

and Forgive Us Our Tresp’s’s

as we Forgive Those Who Trespass Against Us

Forthineisthekingdomthepowerandthegloryforeverandver

Ahhhhhmn. 

Andnowohlordwebeseechthee

To Reunite These Children With Their Loving Families, to Aid Them In Their Suffering, to Bless them with Your Holy Grace, to Watch Over Them All

On Earth

Azitis In Heaven

Ahhhhhhmn.

My knees are getting crinkles in from all the praying.

I do not like assembly even when it is Missing Children’s Day even though I hope they find all the Missing Children.

Distinguishing Features of Lisa: Scar on Left Palm. Two Left Feet. Red hair and Blue eyes and Freckles and Nice Straight Teeth because of wearing Braces even when she didn’t want to.

LOST: LISA.

REWARD OFFERED.

PLEASE REPLY TO THIS ACCOUNT IF SEEN.

I know Lisa is sulking but I would still like her to come back.

Amen.

There is a little tiny squeaking noise in the dark, like a mouse on a swing.

“Stop watching me,”, I say.

I’m getting back into bed because in bed I don’t have to consider that people are probably watching me with no clothes on least of all her.

I’d say I’m sorry but I’m really not.

Squeak squeak squeak.

Where’s Lisa?

Where the fuck is Lisa?